Gooning is one of those things that many men don’t understand, and it is a very, very easy thing to make fun of. Gooning is, in fact, objectively ridiculous. It is also one of the things that holds a key to a freer expression of sexuality through mindful masturbation.
It doesn’t really surprise me that many avid masturbators—social and solitary alike—have no idea what gooning really is, and it’s actually a little hard to describe. In my own words: Gooning is a state of deep sexual experience in which one partially detaches from rational thought and acts more primitively, more feral. It is, by nature, irrational sexual pleasure that can include facial contortions, drooling, deep breathing through the mouth and non-verbal moaning.
It is “deep bate.”
I jack off with a lot of guys, probably more than a hundred in a year, and I have noticed a very controlled space that too many men get into when they’re in a sexual state, like they get more tense and tight as they get closer to orgasm. I see gooning as the opposite of that, allowing yourself to breath through your open mouth, make sounds organically, allow a deeper, more primordial sexual energy to flow freely, to look unabashedly at what you want to see, to essentially release control to indulge in an extravagant experience of deep, physical pleasure.
And to get to that free space, I had to fake it for a while, to act like a monkey or a dog or whatever, to allow myself to be silly, for want of a better word. I think the experience of gooning is not fake, though. I think it’s an organic, deep human process that we are generally cut off from in the sexually-strangled, civilized world. It’s very contrary to our daily existence and way of thinking and being, so for a lot of us, maybe all of us, it takes some work to set it free.
I have caught myself drooling when in a deep goon state, and that includes when having sex with a partner. The first time it happened, I broke into laughter, which also felt freeing.
Dan Savage once remarked about how, in the heat of sex, we can act ridiculous, in ways that we would never behave outside of a sex act or a mental institution, and at the moment of orgasm, all that sanity rushes back to us and we experience a moment of embarrassed disbelief at what idiots we just seemed to be just seconds before. I think that cultivating the deep goon is healthy and accepting that experience, embracing its primordial power, is part of being fully sexual and fully satisfied. The moment after the sexcraziness has passed can be one of awe and honor for our deeper selves instead of embarrassment.
I love meeting other men who can embrace the goon within.
From a distance gooning is completely ridiculous. When I’m gooning I’m making funny faces, I’m sticking my tongue out, I”m imitation animal (usually monkey) noises. It looks completely silly. That’s the point. When I”m gooning, that’s evidence that I have let go. My higher order conscious brain has completely shut off and I’ve surrendered to my primal animal instincts. It is one of the most relaxing and energizing feelings I’ve ever experienced.
Gooning is also hard to do. I found that I have to let go of having to look a certain way. As I’m leading up to gooning I’m aware of the mental noise telling me that I look silly. What if someone sees me? What would my mom say? Good Catholic boys don’t do this. It’s the devil making himself known. The noise goes on and on. Yet, when I let go my body feels in such a natural place. It’s as if this is where I’m really supposed to be. Of course I understand that civilization has its benefits. But sometimes I feel that the usual stuff of civilization is a construct that keeps me from my true, primal self.
After a good goon, my body is completely different. It doesn’t matter if I’ve cum or not. My body is relaxed. My mental state is clear. My energy is high. Sometimes I laugh. Other times I cry. I really don’t know why I sometimes have these strong emotional reactions, but I let go and understand that it’s what my body needed to do in the moment. In short, after a good goon I feel ecstatic to be alive!